Baby (mommy) Prep When Dad Is Gone!

Yep. I had a baby and my husband wasn't there. 

So I know, LITERALLY every pregnancy is different. But there are a few bits of advice I can give you. Especially if you're military, anything can happen. Here are some things to consider, to give yourself the best chance of sanity if you're doing this by yourself!

Prepare, prepare prepare!

• Keep your medical records in your purse!
• At about 34 weeks I asked for a copy of my records from my OB.  Its great to keep them on hand in case you go into labor and end up somewhere other than your hospital. Happened to me and they said that was the smartest thing I could have done. My OB wasn't open so they couldn't call to get my records faxed.

• Have a hospital bag packed WAY before you think you'll need it.
• at 20 weeks I started packing one. Everyone said I was crazy because thats so early but I would just throw random things in when I thought of it. Glad I did because when my water broke I was alone and only 35 weeks. Luckily,  I had almost everything I needed already packed.

• Have somebody/anybody who can take you to the hospital.
• I knew my husband had a chance of being gone so I had a friend (an equally pregnant friend haha) take me to the hospital and she was awesome enough to stay until 5 am with me.
• Have more than one hospital as an option!
• My OB was a 35 min drive without traffic or weather. In Virginia, with the bridges and tunnels that could easily turn into 45 mins to and hour. I ended up going to a different hospital that was closer and had a NICU because I was having a preemie.
• not all hospitals and birthing centers have a NICU so ask when you tour.

• Install the car seat EARLY!
• I installed it as soon as I hit my third trimester. Its not something you want to do after you give birth or even worse when you're in labor.

• Meal Prep!
• Find some recipes that you like, that freeze easy! Make 1-2 a week and freeze them in meal sized portions. Especially if you're going to be alone. The last thing you want to do postparum is to cook for yourself.  I made chili, burritos, enchiladas and lasagna. The burritos were my favorite because I could just put them in the microwave and eat them. 

• Get snacks!
• Granola bars
• cereal 
• fruit cups
• baby carrots
• candy (you know you want it) 
• anything quick and easy

• Stock up on household stuff & toiletries 
• Keep a stock pile of household stuff and toiletries so you don't have to go to the store, alone, with a newborn when you run out. You will run out.  Just buy a little at a time every time you go shopping during pregnancy so you don't have to drop a bunch of extra money. Coupons and sales help! 
• Buy extra:
• toilet paper
• paper towels
• paper plates
• all purpose cleaner
• clorox wipes
• laundry detergent
• dish soap
• hand soap
• hand sanitizer
• shampoo/conditioner 
• body soap
• pads (light and heavy)
• 1 pack of preemie (just in case) 
• I had no preemie diapers or clothes and it was a disaster. She had nothing to wear. 

• Keep an extra bag of dog/cat food
• Buying 30 lb bags of dog food with a baby isn't fun. Get it ahead of time or set up auto delivery from a website like chewy.com.

Minimum Wage Not Enough?

Todays lesson: If you want more money, better yourself. Because there are already way better people working a lot harder making a lot less.

Although I don't agree with the mediocracy remark. Let me just share some knowledge. Someone who is an E1 in the United States military makes ONLY $16,600 a year to work well over 40 hours a week and get deployed to god knows where for months at a time to defend our country and help many others. That's a little more than $7.25 an hour. But that's someone who just joined. Let's say someone has advanced a little bit, you know, gained some knowledge. An E3 starts at $19,300. That's still only just over $10 an hour if they work "40 hours a week" before taxes. But you show me a sailor that only works 40 hours a week. Mine doesn't. So to everyone complaining about not making enough while flipping your burgers and shaking the extra grease off the French fries, there are people getting paid the same as you risking their lives so that you can sit at home and complain about how YOU don't get paid enough. I don't know who these people are who think they deserve ridiculous amounts of money to work a dead end job. But I'm pretty sure they're not the people who have college degrees and just can't find a good job. I'm gonna bet they're the people who got complacent. The ones who, for some reason, feel entitled to things for absolutely no reason. And I don't think its because they were rewarded for being mediocre as a child. Its more likely because their parents never taught them to believe in themselves and be strong independent people. That they're able to better themselves, to have a strong worth ethic, self confidence and self respect. To TRY and take chances. Because THOSE are the things that actually get you places.. But I guess its just easier to just put Johnny on a losing t-ball team and tell him its his fault for not getting a trophy because he isn't good enough...instead of helping him practice. All while crushing his 5 year old dreams to be a pro baseball player. SO, he'll probably never even try..... 

Moving to Virginia : The Good The Bad AND The UGLY!

PCS'ing from San Diego to Norfolk Virginia has been a TRIP! Let me start by saying Murphy's Law. What can go wrong, WILL indeed go wrong. So, with our further adooooo Heres what happened.

My husband and I were bound and determined to make this move go much more smoothly than our last. (which was also a disaster) So we followed all the directions, had a relocation consultation and had all of our ducks in a row. We felt GREAT about the move....other than the fact that we were leaving San Diego.

THEN

The navy threw a huge wrench into our nice organized plans. Go figure. He was told to go to the relocation office and set up our move 10 days before we were leaving. Which we did, we actually went 12 days before just to be safe. Only to get online to schedule the move and have them tell us that if they pick up our household goods when we were moving out of our apartment they wouldn't arrive to our new apartment in Virginia for OVER A MONTH! which was no good because James is deploying soon after checking into his new ship. We absolutely were not living an empty apartment for a month. So we had to have them call us to tell us an earlier date that they could come pack everything up.  (this was on a Friday)  I got a phone call the following Tuesday telling me that they were going to come on Thursday! THAT Thursday! Which was a week before we were leaving, but hopefully our stuff would arrive in Virginia on time. SO we were like 'what the heck, lets just do it".

So we had a week with nothing in our apartment other than our bags, the pets and an air mattress....And still no move money! But I'll get to that in a minute.

Once we left San Diego, we drove to Vegas for a night, then to Fort Morgan Colorado, Chicago Illinois, Cleveland Ohio and then off to Norfolk, VA. It was a LONG drive!

When we reached Chicago, it had been almost a week and we still hadn't received any of the travel money which was beginning to make things difficult because staying in a hotel every night gets really expensive. Especially with 2 pets. After having my husband call them and finding out nothing, I started calling and finally got answers. He filled out for the move money to be advanced so we could have it before we left San Diego, apparently somebody in whatever office that is, didn't realize that and it was still sitting on someones desk. So we had to wait another 4 days to get the money put into my husbands account.

Once we got to Virginia we stayed at the navy lodge until we could find an apartment. Which took 3 days because we were SO sick of moving and wasting money on hotels we picked the first thing we looked at. A very nice girl we met at the PETA dog park, who's husband is also Navy, recommended it to us. And it turned out to be Okay. Its not as nice as what we're used to but, its only for 11 months, and James will be deployed for 8 of them.  The place is super dog friendly and has a dog park in the complex, so Finn's happy.

We had to wait another week to have all of our household goods delivered....which was VERY frustrating but it felt good to at least be 'home' even if home was still empty. Once our things finally arrived it was bitter sweet because SO much of it was broken or damaged. Almost everything that wasn't put in a box, they broke...

• My Antique Dining Room Table had an entire corner knocked off

• The solid wood leaf coffee table's end brace was knocked off. Like, it snapped off, it didn't just come loose. 

• Our 3 Drawer Dresser bottom brace was also knocked off and they taped it back together with packing tape.

• And lastly our king memory foam mattress has a tear the size of my hand in the cover and the liner. I'm not sure how we're going to fix that because I already looked and I can't find a new cover or liner and it was a BRAND NEW mattress it was only 4 months old.

We are currently in the claim precess....fingers crossed!

Moving to Norfolk Virginia

Our San Diego dream life has come to a screeching halt. The unthinkable, yet inevitable, has happened. My husband received orders to Norfolk, Va. The one place we really didn't want to go. Of course. No offense to Norfolk, we just love where we are. Perfect location, perfect apartment, perfect everything. But hey, all things must pass right?.... Sigh. Thanks George Harrison.

So now what? First and foremost, we're trying to get excited. We're excited for Jimmy to finally start his career and he's excited to have a ship. I'm excited to finally live somewhere long enough to get a job again! (THANK GOD) Not working, isn't all its cracked up to be. And although we don't love the immediate area we'll be living in, I do like a lot of areas that are somewhat near Norfolk, so thats nice. Silver Linings.

But anyways. We're desperately searching for an apartment/house. Its so hard looking for a good place to live when you're on the other side of the country. You kind of just have to do your research and hope for the best. Otherwise you're stuck in a crappy apartment, in a crappy area. Then your husband deploys and you're alone in the crappy apartment in the ghetto and that just sucks. We've done it before and its miserable. So the search begins, we have a little less than 2 months before we get there.

Now this time lets hope all of our stuff gets there in once piece. Our last move was a disaster, we had 2 broken tables, a missing box, another box that that smelled and looked like a cat peed on it (we didn't even have our cat when we moved so we know it wasn't him!) and a hole in our toaster oven. AND jimmy lost our inventory sheet so we couldn't get any of it replaced. :(

And lastly, the drive....
Ugh. Driving cross country is fun, once, when you have all the time in the world. Not twice in a matter of 9 months. whoa is me.

Planning. Ready. Set. GO!

Things That Bother Me...

It really bothers me...

When people go about their lives in a way that is only conducive to themselves and what they want. And then get offended when others don't bend over backwards to satisfy them.

       I guess I don't like when people are selfish.

When you aren't treated with respect but are expected to give respect in return.

.double standards.

When I'm expected to be a certain way.
And I'm not.

When people think everything is about them.
Vanity.

When I'm expected to lie about how I feel.

It makes me uncomfortable.

When people act one way, but portray themselves completely differently.
Who are you?

When people shelter their children from the world, life, bills, sadness.

       You're doing your child a disservice. Let them live and learn! Otherwise they'll be a very confused, unhappy and surprised adult.

When people think you're being disrespectful for speaking your mind.

       I'm allowed to have my own opinion about my own life and speak about it.

When people get angry with myself or my husband for not saying 'Congrats', 'Happy Birthday' or giving them any other sort of praise when THEY wanted us to.

I'm sorry, but we are our own family, with our own responsibilities and schedules. Be patient and have a little faith.

When its uncomfortably hot out.
100% humidity.

When someone who is close to you try's to guilt you into things with drama or ultimatums. 

      You shouldn't have to.

When people are racist.
You are not better than anyone else.

When someone has a predetermined idea of what the 'right' thing to do is.

Maybe what's right for us, is different than whats you think is right for us.

When I can't get over something I feel like I should have gotten over a long time ago.

And its still bothers me.

When people can't be alone.

You're never lonely if you love the person that you're alone with. (yourself)

When people pretend like everything is OK even when you all know that it isn't. 

Surprising your issues won't make you forget and it won't make them go away.

People expect you to have kind words, when they did nothing to receive them.

You can't be a nasty person and expect it to all go away when you decide you don't want to be nasty any more.

When parents won't let their child grow up.

       You should have spent their entire childhood helping them grow, learn and teaching them how to be a strong, independent, well rounded person. So that when they do leave, you can be proud instead of angry.

- Someday you won't be there to hold their hand, then what? -

When people tell you to apologize for something that you have no reason to be sorry for.

.

When people have unrealistic expectations.
Dream big. Expect little.

When the laundry smells weird.
It's just gross.

When adults tell their children (who are also adults) what to do.

We are married and live on our own. Advice and suggestions are always welcome, demands are not.

When people do things just to say that they did them.

What's the point of bragging?

When someone tells me they're sorry but what they did still makes me sad.

FLEAS - How To Prevent & Get Rid Of Fleas

This seems like a strange thing to blog about but it is very near and dear to my heart. Fleas are terrible creatures and can turn you absolutely mad! Trust me. I know. They are very easy to get and next near impossible to get rid of. We recently had a flea infestation and I had a 2 month long flea genocide. But, now, I can safely say we are almost 100% flea free.


Steps To Prevent Fleas:

1.  Spend the extra money and go with a name brand flea preventative. It stinks for fork over $120 for 6 months, $240 for a year of flea treatment for 2 pets, but its worth it in the long run. Getting rid of fleas is expensive. If you're on a budget you can get 2-4 doses at a time at places like Petco and PetSmart. Also try Chewy.com or 1800petmeds.com You shouldn't need a prescription.
2. There are heartworm preventatives that also prevent fleas. Some kill fleas some just 'control' fleas. Make sure you know what you have. Ex. We use Sentinel, it helps to control fleas but it in now way would stop a flea infestation.
3. DO NOT bathe your dog/cat before applying a topical flea treatment. It works by working with the sebaceous oil glands on the dogs/cats skin and if you wash your dog, there is little to no oil left. 
4. Check reviews online and ask your vet and ask around locally. I really like Advantage II and K9Advantix. Frontline Plus worked fine for me in Illinois but in California it did nothing. The vet said fleas are most likely becoming immune to certain flea preventives in certain regions. Yay..... Next the little ass holes are gonna learn how to swim...  
5. Treat your yard once a year just to be safe. If you rent, see if they can treat your apartment at least once a year.

Steps To Get Rid Of A Flea Infestation:

1. Don't panic! This is going to take some time.
2. If your dog/cat isn't on a flea preventative see the previous list and do all 4 of those things IMMEDIATELY. 
• If your dog/cat IS on a flea preventative you may need to try a different one or apply another dose. Only apply more than 1 dose in a month if the directions say its OK! I know the directions for Advantage II say if there is an infestation you can apply a second application after 7 days. I'm sure its not great for the pets but neither is getting eaten alive especially when they have flea allergies so....pick your battles.Sometimes it takes up to 2 separate applications (so up to 2 months) to start really working.
• Keep in mind, after 2 doses or 2 months whichever comes first for you, and you still have a bad infestation, they're coming from somewhere. So really try to find the source of the fleas. It might help to try switching from Frontline Plus to Advantage II or vise versa, I also heard that alternating between the two every other month is a good idea. 
3. If you live in an apartment or rental, see if they spray the lawn for fleas and see if they can come treat your apartment. Don't be embarrassed, if you have fleas its almost certain that other people living there do to. It was free for us. 
4. Buy Capstar, the generic is Capguard and give your dog/cat one pill each day that you apply their topical. This kills live fleas on your pet for up to 24 hours but will only work if you use it with a flea preventative. This doesn't kill everything it just helps.
5. If you are treating your home yourself, buy some type of spray, bomb or powder for your carpet and follow the directions on the container. Remember they can live in cracks, carpet and floor boards, anywhere.
6. Clean. EVERYTHING! The day you give the Capstar and the topical treatment you will want to wash all of the pet bedding if its washable, if not, toss it and give them a cozy towel to sleep on until the flea problem is resolved. Wash all the rugs like bathroom and kitchen rugs, your bedding and pillows. You will continue to wash the pet bedding at least twice a week!
7. Vacuum EVERYTHING Ever.Single.Day for at least 2 weeks, probably longer! (this is the worst part) All the carpet, all of the couches, all of the cushions, under everything (even the bed) and along all of the edges, the cat tree (you may have to get rid of the cat tree if you have it, see if vacuuming works first). If you have a clear vacuum you'll probably see a lot of fleas jumping around in there. Yuck! Make sure to put it in a closed bag and remove it from your home ASAP.
8. Keep in mind the fleas will not go away immediately. The flea life cycle is at least 2 weeks and they're not all on the same schedule so you can still see live fleas for a month or two. I swear it got worse before it got better. And once the fleas couldn't live on the dog/cat anymore they started biting us, but that only lasted a day or two. That's why its important to vacuum every day so you can physically remove the bastards from your home.

DON'T
Try to save money and get the cheap preventatives (topicals, collars, whatever) to see if they'll work. Especially if you already have fleas. They won't work and you're literally throwing money away because you'll have to go back and get the good, expensive stuff.
DON'T
Wash your dog before applying a topical treatment. They need to have oil on their skin.
DON'T
expect the fleas to go away after one treatment, they can live in your home and reinvest your pets.

Work Out With Me | Tone Legs and Butt

Tone Legs and Butt

Squats, squats wonderful squats! You'll be doing each exercise for 30 seconds and then repeat the whole thing. Its really quick and you can do it anywhere! As always, whenever doing squats or lunges be mindful of your knees. Make sure your knees are never going past your toes. Thats how you get hurt.

To make it easier, don't squat as deep.
To make it harder, do deeper squats and you can add 3-5 lb weights when you squat.

Exercises:

Regular Squats
Wide Leg Squats
Cross Behind Lunges
Regular Lunges
Butt Ups
Fire Hydrants
Side Leg Lifts